SOMEONE

has a very bad case of learned helplessness. she will not even TRY, with help, to do anything she deems unnecessary. this includes sitting herself upright from her back. rolling over. getting from point a to point b if she doesnt feel like it. so right now she is screaming at me as her crackers wait for her at the table. I wont go get her to carry her. she is ticked off. kicking things and screaming. She is much more content to sit and scream than to TRY to do anything. I know that rome wasnt built in a day and she isnt going to go from lying to sitting or dressed to naked, or even naked to dressed in a day. I am more than willing to standby assist but she wont even TRY! not even to lift her head from the floor or pull herself up using something stable. this is going to be a long long battle.

I just went over and offered again to help and forced her to do it(with my help) and then rewarded her with her cookies(crackers) and YAAAAYY! then I gave her the cup and she wouldnt even reach for it, wants me to put it in her mouth. umm no. you are fully capable and I have seen it a hundred thousand times. so I helped her use her arms to do it herself. and she wont let just anyone give her the cup. only me. if maia or someone else offers it she screams. but she CAN do it herself. this is not something she needs to learn she already KNOWS how. We use a cup that is appropriate for her ability and she has been doing it herself since shortly after getting her home.

She is a tough nut to crack. a spoiled nut at that. she is awful cute its hard not to spoil her but she IS nearly 4 and needs to start TRYING to be capable for some of the things she needs to do in life.

sick sick sickk

wonder boys are still sick. wonder baby is better. big wonder brother and sis have it now. The wonder boys are the worst. whining and crying and NOTHING is right. cant go to the bathroom alone, cant open the door alone, cant drink the water alone, cant eat without help. just whine whine whine. I can see its going to take awhile AFTER the flu to get out of THAT habit. Ben just cries all day Ethan complains all day and asks me for every thing he sees a commercial for. Sophie is just crabbier than normal. she is crabby and bossy to begin with. its her general personality. Cody is just sleeping sleeping. Chrysta seems to be making a miraculous recovery. guess she just didnt want to do dishes!

I wish I had something to say besides sick kids. but my life is pretty consumed right now with sick kids! I would like to run away from home and not hold anyone! I would like my arms back thank you! I am feeling better but still get hot and cold and exhausted and then I have to take care of everyone else. ahhh a mothers job is never done.

the whole house is sick

well several of us anyways. The wonder boys are both sick. Wonder baby is sick too. Mama is sick. Maia is better but was sick. Eric had flumist and hasnt gotten sick. for whatever reason Cody and Chrysta havent gotten sick either. Poor Ben is mierable and just cries and lays around. Ethan is perking up but still pale and feverish. but well enough to be annoying and bossy to his sibs. Sophie teeters between feeling better and not feeling good. She stayed up with eric last night when I went to bed because she just wanted to be held and rocked. she woke up screaming histerical in the night twice and wouldnt be soothed by my voice. but when Eric spoke to her she settled. Not sure what that was all about.

Shriners wants medical records in order to treat the kids. except I dont HAVE medical records. they didnt seem to understand that in international adoption you get nothing. NOTHING. so they wont treat them without records and I dont have records to give. so they have to go to the doctor just to have a record I can send. seems kind of stupid to me. redundant. they kept asking why they dont have any records. HELLOO! they are ADOPTED! from UKRAINE! you just dont GET medical records! we dont even know what they have had done. husband says oh they have only been home a short time its no big deal. but it is a big deal. Poor Ben Ben's feet are so mangled. I have to give him motrin to get him to sleep through the night because he wakes hurting so bad. also I dont think his AFOs fit correctly, there is big space behind his leg. and I am tired of taking Sophie to the bathroom every hour because she cant do it herself. she is almost 4 she NEEDS to get help so she can start doing some things herself! oddly enough I havent heard from school either about finding a translator for a preschool screening.

isnt it funny

that the word for airplane and family are so similar.

kids. wish I had a dozen of them. (thats what my dad used to say)

the kids are going down the hill in the bike trailer stroller. and laughing all the way. how can I tell them not to when they are having so much fun? It isnt their safety I am so much worried about rather the safety of the stroller to handle it. but I imagine they will tire of it soon enough and move on to more exciting adventures. I always wanted to build a roller coaster of my own after reading about a boy in a book who did that. So here they are essentially making a roller coaster and lovin it. good for them. soon enough there will be snow and they can sled down the same hill. Ben was not so sure at first but he is doing it with them now.

Ben asked me yesterday when we were getting ready to leave if we were going to groupa. I said no groupa. groupa all done. he jumped off the toilet to hug me round the neck with the biggest smile. today again he was asking groupa? I said no groupa all done. and said family. (thanks christine for the word) and he smiled. It has been about a month now they have been home and they never mentioned groupa before recently. hopefully they will get the message that they are not ever going back there. that groupa is over for them.

how many days till school starts??? I dont know what is up with Ethan. I am having a hard time dealing with his anger and outbursts and his screaming! and freaking out over everything the little kids do. if they get hurt he gets angry. if the get mad and cry he gets angry. if they get tired and cry he gets angry. if they squabble over a toy he gets angry. every time he gets angry he starts stomping his feed and screaming. Why am I so lucky? No one, NO ONE ever sees this stuff but me. he never pulls this stuff with grandma. yesterday he was out with daddy all day and nary a problem. but he has always been this way with me, it's just worse now. and piano practice! ugh! forget it! anything I say to him about how or what to do he goes ballistic. why are we paying for piano lessons when he wont practice what he needs to and screams at me when I try to help him. I am really getting tired. tired in so many ways. emotionally tired from being screamed at all day and having every negativity in the house aimed at ME. physically tired because I have not slept solid through the night in a couple months. since before we came home from Ukraine the first trip. Sophie gets tangled in the blankets and cant move so she cries at night. Ben wakes crying every couple of nights. (I am banning scooby doo for awhile to see if he is having nightmares from scary scooby doo)

C and C are gone to the cities this weekend to go be with...uhh....whats the right word....the jerk? no. the idiot? no. oh father, yes they are with their father. and its deer hunting this weekend so my MIL and my own mother are coming to stay. hopefully it will be more fun than stressful to have them here. its only 930m and we have been up for HOURS, feels like naptime already. ugh.

Funny Ben and Sophie

The dog was barking abd Ben started counting him to time out. lol
Sophie was on the toilet and pretending to snore and had her eyes closed. She was telling me she understood it was time for bed. They can be such a riot! and Sophie is becoming generous and I am so proud of her for that. There is always a certain toy that everyone wants. I made Ben let her have a turn with it after he carried it around for HOURS. he wasnt happy. She was carrying it around and not really playing with it just hanging on to it for the sake of having it. After quite a while I asked if Ben could have a turn and she initially said NAY! but I asked her again gently and didnt move to take it from her. and she changed her mind and handed it over to ben saying NA! NA! When she does this I grab her and praise her up and down and smile and show her how proud I am of her. This is the little girl that would be ready to take off your arm if you got close enough to take a toy. what a long long way she has come. I can also see her smile is more genuine now. her expressions are more real. and when I come home from anywhere, even just the basement she comes to greet me with hugs and kisses and very happy faces.

Ben is very sweet always. he shows his appreciation for the things I do for him. He gives me kisses and tells me he loves me when I do things for him. Yesterday his pants were soaked, his socks were soaked, even his unders were soaked from playing outside. I took the wet stuff all off. he was crossing his legs and saying piska! I asked piska brrrrr? he laughed at that. then started telling me something about godzilla piska! that cracked me up. I got him all dressed in dry clothes and he hugged me and kissed me and told me he loved me. Very sweet boy. when someone else is yelling he blows me kisses or hugs my arm. I sure do love that boy.

Ethan is having a hard time still. We decided to send him to school. Tht will give him some time away from the new sibs and a chance to make some friends of his own. While he isnt happy about that decision I think after a day or two he is going to love it. We also decided to send the other kids to school as well. its just too hard to juggle it all. upcoming medical appointments will be many and I wont have the time to keep on them about school. Ethan will start Monday and the other two will start on Nov 30 as thats when the trimester changes. Not much sense in taking the last two weeks of a class you wont get credit for and you missed the first two and half months!

Maia likes preschool but is nervous already about going to K next year. Ben and Sophie will probably join her in preschool soon. and Ben can go to K next year too so she wont have to worry about being alone. She loves her new sibs but wants to help Ben more than he needs. And Sophie still doesnt quite know what to do with a sister. sloooooow progress. yesterday when Maia came home from school Sophie said HI MAIA!! MAIA!!